The Not-So-Farm Farm Night

Rhidach wasn’t around for last night’s raid. I tanked last night with Antigen of Haz Mace Will Raid, who dutifully threw on a prot set to hang out with me at the super-exclusive Boss Crotch Club.

I feel like yesterday was opposites day, but no one remembered to tell me about it. Three difficult bosses (Halion, Saurfang, and Blood Princes) were as simple as pie, while unquestionably farm bosses (Marrogar and BQL) decided to present us with a string of problems.

Halion 25N

Halion was an easy kill with no deaths at all. I really have to practice my strafing movement as per Wrathy’s excellent guide, because I strafe too much without moving forwards and have to adjust sometimes. But it was mostly right, and he died with ease.

The real challenge in Ruby Sanctum remains the trash. We made it through all the trash without wiping, even though we face-pulled two of the mob groups and failed to CC the Commander on one of them. That, in itself, I felt was worthy of progression DKP!

Marrogar 25H

I feel like Tricks of the Trade has to come with a tooltip that says something like “Best used on unsuspecting healers,” and our three rogues gleefully comply. Usually it’s a fun game to hold threat while the healer finds their Tricks cancel macro, and one Rhi and I invariably win. But I wasn’t expecting it, and so while I was positioning Marrogar (read: backing away while he wandered over to me) our resto shammy pulled threat. Marrogar cleaved half the raid. I blame only myself. Never again will I position a boss like a lazy bum.

The fun didn’t stop there. Antigen’s telepathy is strong, but just wasn’t good enough to keep up with my random coldflame dancing when I am lazy about calling out where I’m moving. We went opposite ways on a coldflame, and I ate a unmitigated Saber Lash and dropped like a rock. Battle rezzes were down. I spent the rest of the fight skillfully tanking the floor while Antigen stared down boss crotch like a pro in nothing but offspec tank gear and 3 or 4 million health to go.

It was nothing short of hilarious to watch a string of plate DPS come up to the front of the boss one by one, like a queue of lambs approaching the alter, ready and willing to be slaughtered at the whim of RNG. Each one popped whatever mitigation cooldowns they had and slowly died, one after another, until the boss finally hit the floor.

Lady Deathwhisper 25H

This is how pros kill Lady D.

Saurfang 25H

A night of farm hilarity was marked by one gloriously easy kill.

I posted yesterday on Saurfang Blood Beasts. I owe everyone on twitter thanks for helping me, but the best advice without question came from FeistTheRogue – who recommended using less healers – and Matticus from World of Matticus, who told me a fabulous DPS trick that gave us critical extra time on beasts.

One of our trees went Boomkin, giving us access to 2 Typhoons and leaving us with 5 healers. A much, much better setup.

I had been using the wrong DPS strat all along. I had originally told the ranged to burn the left side beasts first, while we stunned the right side ones and killed them second. This is great for 10, but really a stupid plan for 25s. Instead I told the ranged to kill the beasts on the opposite sides from them (as they could). The boomkins Typhoon’d, the ele shammies traded off with Thunderstorm, and we used Frost DK Chillblains for an AE slow as usual.

We had a huge positioning error in the center and Saurfang gained blood power ridiculously fast from Nova. But it didn’t matter. Beasts were cleanly, cleanly killed. He went down like butter, and the fight felt a ton easier than usual.

That felt damn good.

Blood Prices 25H was an easy one-shot with no deaths at all. The tried-and-true “If you’re melee, FOR GOD’S SAKE DON’T ATTACK VALANAR” strategy proves its worth yet again.

Blood Queen Lanath’el 25H

Dear Fury Warrior #494509865069845.

I understand a little bit about how you think. I know. I have Festergut, and you have BQL. Penis size is roughly proportional to the length of the Recount DPS bar, and BQL is without a doubt the best chance to prove that you are at least four inches more e-manly than the next best asshole in the raid. Actually, I think gearscore factors into the penis math there somehow too… but I digress.

But let’s get one thing straight. If you have been DC’ing all night, if the raid waits 3 or 4 minutes on you to reconnect right before BQL, and your raid leader shrugs and says “We can 24 man this with ease, let’s just do it.” … Don’t go balls to the wall and get the first bite.

My squealing, girly admiration for the vast size of your epeen will fall before my fury at wiping on the easiest Heroic mode of them all when you inevitably DC, especially when it costs us the Blood Wing weekly.

Not to mention, doing this to my favorite holy pally:

I am very protective of my precious tank healers, and that lights my goddamn fuse. (Side note: She was annoyed at the time but later mused, “He’s getting better at it. The circle was cleaner tonight.” I guess practice makes perfect.)

So. Fury Warrior. It’s probably not worth asking me anymore if I have a spot for you in my ICC Lich King Heroic 10 man. I’ve got at least fourteen people requesting a spot every week, and you’ve now cemented your spot at the bottom of the list, somewhere after my 12 year old cousin’s level 34 rogue and Morvain’s cat. So stop asking.

We wiped, and then we killed. End of story.

Fate is a Huge, Huge Bitch

A note on Rhidach’s absence. He wasn’t on vacation. He was on standby.

This guy is 100% committed to his guild and our extensive standby system, which he forced into place despite guild politics and drama. He has endured months of complaints, rants, drama, and whining, and stood strong despite all the irritation people who hate standby have thrown at him.

He saved the guild, without a shadow of a doubt. We kept raiding throughout the summer with 30 to 35 people signed up week after week while competing guilds dropped dead from boredom or attendance problems. And his commitment to the standby system that originally brought me to this server is so strong that this week he put himself – the raid leader, GM, and main tank – on standby, just to be fair.

Fate really is a bitch.

The one, single item, that he has always wanted most out of ICC – which he has been jokingly bleeding my DKP for – the one thing which he has lusted after and posted about for ages, and fully deserved, and which I knew he’d win off me and secretly wanted him to have…

… of course, it would drop tonight.

Winning it for 1 DKP made me feel bad. I didn’t even have the heart to joke about it.

On the other hand, he has the BQL 264 shield. I however have seen absolutely nothing shield-like drop for months, and pathetically, I was using the Gunship 10 shield. The normal shield. Yes…. the 251 shield.

And so a minor upgrade for him became a massive, massive upgrade for me… and therefore, probably, a better upgrade for the raid.

RNG works in mysterious ways.